Prayer For A Friend.

Lord,
I lift my friend to You.
I've done all that I know to do.

I lift my friend, to You.
Complicated circumstances have clouded his view.

Lord I lift my friend up to You.

I fear that I won't have the words that he needs to hear.
I pray for Your wisdom , oh God.
And a heart that's sincere.
And Lord I lift my friend up to You.

Lord I lift my friend to You.
My best friend in the world, I know he means much more to You.
I want so much to help him, but this is something he has to do.
Lord I lift my friend up to You.

There's a way that seems so right to him.
But You know where that leads.
He's becoming a puppet of the world.
Too blind to see the strings.
And Lord I lift my friend up to You.

Lord I lift my friend to You.
I've done all that I know to do.
I lift my friend, to You.

b'zee

Adulthood comes with responsibilities which in the form of busy-ness.
Ian would said it as the joy of being adult.
I must agree with him...

It just keeps me on going,
keeps me on the track where I must focus on my studies, writing, presentation,
keeps me less thinking about un-appropriate thoughts (doesn't matter how you interpret it ;))
keeps me good, I guess. ;)
means no late night outing, productive dawn as I will finished my works before the morning come instead of online pointlessly, sleepy day time due to burning the midnite oil, and zombie after lunch time.

But sometime I am terrified how I love being busy.
Maybe I am just being selfish cuz I got a lot of things on my mind.
the only thing I do now is work and sleep.
both would make me less thinking about how hurt it is.

Some pea'ple interpret my busy-ness as 'sorry, I don't want to hang out with you.'
oh well, pea'ple gonna think what they gonna think.
I have no power over these things.

and...
I can be not busy, I can delay my works for sure,
but I want to finish it now and play after that until I vomit!
means I'll be free soul after this week, I hope so.

Gotta get back to my busy schedule, I am busy, remember?

xoxo

If isn't LOVE, then what it is?

It's a beautiful day.

From my blue bed in the living room of VI-VII-III,
Morning starts with message from Down Under from an Angel above.
This Angel is like the gravity that whenever I'm ready to leave,
it always pulling me back,
No matter how high I jump, escaping it, it pulls me back to the good ground,
Holding me close with those big warmth arms.
You dunno where this gonna lead, neither do I,
but for sure Im'ma hold you close to my heart, forever.
I love you.

From TWU to SDK,
They traveled to seek for love,
to bring two hearts together,
though the ceremony might be different than what we used to back home,
though it's what he can't afford,
though he missed his best man,
his lil bro,
the big day is ON.

Am I sad, yes.
Am I mad, No

It sounds unreal when you get more love from someone whom you know 2 years back instead from the one that grows up with you.
twenty-2 years VS 2 years.
For now, 2 years won.

I love my brother with all my heart regardless what he done to me, to us,
today is your big day,
I am happy for you, really,
be a good hubby to her,
be a good father to your kid(s),
be a better son to them, brother to us.

I Need A New Bottle!

last night, he is not being himself.
being someone else that want to be accepted.
guess what?
the more he tried, the more he git rejection
he makes fool of himself and
I feel sorry for his pathetic-ness.

He don't see it coming, He don't.
I say, 'it rather your stupidity to not to see it
blindfolded yourself,
'I closed my eyes, then I don't see lo' '

He;
danced
sings
drink
just like what 'required'

but I guess he never gonna being noticed like the rest.
except; one-the fun and just broke up fat boy
two-rival?
grabbed the girls hands, kiss goodbye to the rest,
still, not being noticed we're leaving.
on the way back,
he started to winding around with the questions that made the girls and the taxi mate annoyed;
is it bcuz of my pimples?
or my hair? should i git it cut?
is it my not-Louboutin-shoes?
am i that ugly?
while the tears of self sympathy covering his eyes
and the cigarette smells all over his hairs, and hers
and that fat boy smells

'emoshunal?' I asked. He said 'Nah...'

I told him, 'Git a new bottle, bitch!!!'
It came with the SAME
shape,
taste,
brand, and
%tage of alcohol.

and, it might be better.

What hurt the most

What hurt the most, is being so close and having so much to say, yet seeing you walked away.
Never knowing what could've been and not seeing loving you is what I was trying to do.

It's hard to deal with the pain of losing you everywhere I go,
It's hard to force that smile when I see my 'what could've been with you' happened to him,
It's hard to say OK when I am not,
It's hard to talk about it 'cuz it'll cost me tears.

I would trade give away the good bye with anything in my life.
But here comes the goodbye, here comes the pain, here comes me wishing things had never changed and you was right here in my arms tonight...

Why does it have to go from good to gone?

BUT,
I prayed to the good Lord, you both have a blast in your days, no matter whats gonna happen to us, the He'll lead the way.
before the lights on, I'm gonna be fine knowing that you'd chose the best.

Maybe forgiveness will find me somewhere down this road, but I guess no forgiveness given 'cuz there is nothing to forgive.

NOW,
There comes a time in my life, when all I can see is the years passing by,but lemme make up my mind that those days are gone.

I'll move on but most importantly I'll move forward.

your pickle,
g

Bonne année!

It's OVER! 2009 gonna be a year to remember in my life.
But 2010, it's gonna be the year that level up my life and striving the best that I ever achieve.

Let's rewind back what had happened in my life last year;

It starts with a new year resolution that somehow did shape my future in last year.
I thought it just a crazy dreams that I want to achieve.
But, hey, there is no harm in asking!
Thank God even crazy dreams come true!
End up in three beautiful places that somehow my childhood dream-place-to-visit (UK), feels darn good!!
These dreams of mine changes me a lot, for the better me, of course.

Talking about changing, I've known many of people around me going thru' some big changes in their life.
Struggle, tryin', lookin', believing that there's something more beyond the hill.
Some of them moved to get a new job, other moved from relationship, and some other tryin' to know themselves even more, while some other said that, they can't even imagine that they could love again!
It need a whole lot of guts to do some changes in life, unable to foresee whether they gonna be hire, whether the relationship is better than the previous one, whether the person is the right one for them, or how they gonna manage the new love they'd found?

Some says; changes is the only thing that is constant in our life, and yes!
I kept on changing in 2009. I struggled to find the right path to excel in my study, life, dreams, and my future. Did I find it complete yet? NO.
But the year totally teaching me so many thing; love, failures, friendship, companionship, belief in my dreams, and the most important thing is stay on the ground.
Sometime I treated my life like a fairytale, like Romeo & Juliet's love story kinda.
And it kills me most of the times. Well, at least I live and learned from it.

2010; gonna be blast! I just know it.

I wish myself the best of all the possibilities in the world and beyond, and to ya'll too.
Gill now know that crazy dreams can come true too as long as stay on the solid ground!

xoxo

Lately

Here I am again, writing my piece of my mind.

Lately, life had been so so for me because nothing great had happen so far.
BUT, nothing more greater than finishing exams!! Yahoooo….. This is the time of year where you celebrate your freedom from your rushing lifestyle and due dates. However, doing nothing can kill most of us because we just used to our rushing lifestyle and for someone like me, I need a lot of stimulant in my life because I change and get bored too fast.

Whatever the feeling is about exams, this time is holy-days!!! We all need some time off from anything that we do no matter how we like the job- have time to sharpen your axe for more efficient trees cutting.

I will go back to where my life starts and for sure not the place my life ends! *wink* and it’s the fruit season! Uh huh, the great Durian, here I come! I can smell the smell of it now and I’ma sleep with it, sell it, eat it, vomit it out, and get sick from it!!

sign off,
g