Last week I went home, from 25th - 30th Oct 2011.
The reasons;
Mom is sick
I am home sick
Sick staying in KL
Despite the bad experience w. AirAsia that I decide not to reveals here, I manage to finally see my family after the last home coming in August.
Here's the thing about going home.
It's lovely to spends some time w. your loved one.
The conversation. The jokes. The affections. The foods. The catching up.
Being home, how great thou art.
However, what is my family w/o dramas? Oh come on, look at me, I'm a drama queen.
My family is very conservative when it comes to dealing w. dramas.
We tend to silence it up and try not to talk about it, in hoping that it'll go away on its own.
Guess what, it failed in styles.
The problems keep coming back like Lindsay Lohan to the court, the frequency and the condition always keep getting worse.
And everybody wants to have piece of it.
Sister blows up.
Bro-in-law silence.
Mak wants to say something.
Pak agrees w. her.
Niece cries wanting Angry Birds books but didn't gets the attention bcuz everybody's having their shitty moment.
And ME, 'I just wish that we all being happy that I'm actually home.'
Mak brought me to our backyard.
Her getaway. Her cave. Her artwork. Her obsession.
She planted paddy. Corns. Fruits. Chillies.
We talked about many things in that hour.
She ramble. I listen.
I never seems to like her rambles before, but that particular day, her rambles get me quiet in a good way. Telling me her secrets that none knows about.
Along the rambles, I comments here and there.
The talking gives me realisation how mature I became.
The listening makes me want to bring her out of this place ASAP. Where to? Just out of this shit holes. Starts a new. There's too much things happened here.
From the miserableness of getting this piece of land and losing it to some corrupted government, to the lost of my beloved eldest sister, and the other modern dramas after Mak's kids reached puberty.
No matter how far I go, my heart belongs to this place.
No replacement.
No substitute.
Nothing likes it.
But then I realise, being home is just the physical rituals. I manage to capture my feeling that says, 'I don't mind where I be as long as I'm w. Mak and Pak, that's where my HOME is.'
Giving back to our parent is not necessary. As they gave their all to raise and make us human w/o wanting anything back as return. But it's our duty to assure them that we are human, not what they WANT us to be, but what TAUGHT us to be.
It doesn't matter what we've become, a lawyer, a doctor, a teacher, a politician, a mother, a father, or a friend, our parents didn't ask for those material things, but what they really want is for us to give them a life that they don't have for raising us.
The quietness as they suffered listening to our cries.
The best dinner as they skipped their's to take care of us when we're sick.
Early morning serenity as they woke up early to get you ready for school.
Good Christmas outfit to put on as they sacrifices their's to give you the best look every year.
Holidays as they work all year round to look after us.
As a son to my parent, I wish I can fulfil at least one of their dreams on top of my best plans for them. Bringing Pak to a Muay Thai match, and Mak to enjoy Bali for as long as she wanted to. Simple yet it's something that I caught from their conversation.
Guys, do take care of our parent yeah? Our breath are theirs.
I thoroughly enjoyed that piece of your mind. I am proud of you, your understanding of your family, your mature outlook and your tenderness. You have grown so much from when I first know you.
ReplyDeleteThat lil Gil is finding his way to the starting point. And you saw me growing all these years. And honestly, you're one of my inspiration as what I am today.
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